merry christmas!

christmas eve

ain't that the truth.
fingers crossed he sleeps through the night!
thanks Kristy for the hilarious onesie! :)

dear elevator lady,

yes, i am aware that it is freezing outside. and yes, actually, i do have a hat for my baby. but seeing as we are inside where its warm, i'm not too concerned about it. also, did you notice the gigantic bundle me he happens to be wrapped up in?

quite frankly, i am more concerned about the stranger on the elevator, that would be you, that feels the necessity to touch my baby. i don't know you, and i don't know where your hands have been.

so...maybe you should stop worrying about my mothering abilities and start worrying about your germs.

ok? thanks.

sleep deprivation

we are sleep deprived. would you believe me if i told you that last night, as i crawled into bed at 3 am, wade and i had the following conversation:

w: "did you get the tin foil?"
k: "the tin foil?"
w: "yeah, did you bring the tin foil?"
k: "wade. the tin foil? for what?"
w: "to wrap miles in. we need to wrap him in tin foil."

imagine my confusion. i just laughed and then went to sleep. i still don't know what he was talking about. in his defense, he was probably sleep talking. but maybe it has something to do with me saying, "good night little burrito" to miles every night after i wrap him up in his blanket.

oh, and if you're still waiting for a delivery story, come babysit long enough for me to write one.

i love this boy.

diapers.
feeding.
laundry.
sleep.

my current priorities.

delivery details coming soon...
but in the mean time, just know that I'm in love with my baby.

we proudly present...

our little boston baked bean.

miles wade poulsen
november 8, 2009
8 lbs. 15 oz.
7:01 am
20.5 inches

portland head lighthouse

our last day in maine, we drove down to portland to see another lighthouse. on the way, we saw this cool bridge.

the portland head lighthouse was so pretty...but it was a little anti-climatic. I mean, really, can you beat the stripes? i think not.

and that is the end of our trip to maine.
pray that my next post is about the arrival of our child.
otherwise, i will be insane.

acadia national park

our next stop in maine was acadia national park. we camped. yes. 8 months pregnant and i camped. camped...but did not sleep. and this was even MY style of camping. you know the kind where you drive up on a paved road, park your car, and pitch your tent by a fire pit and a picnic table? the kind with flushing toilets and running water? wade is not a fan. wade would rather put everything he needs in a backpack and hike 20 miles into the middle of nowhere. (one time, he took me to an REI and started showing me backpacks and hiking boots. I was like, "those are lovely honey, but you already have that stuff." and then he told me that it was for me. ME. I laughed. and that might have been mean, but it really was quite funny. I am not a backpacker.)

we went on some beautiful (and short) hikes to the beach and to the top of a "mountain" that was more like a hill... i think these people are deprived and don't know what a real mountain is. but i have never seen such an amazing coastline and i absolutely fell in love with maine.

we made tin foil dinners and smores that night. The next morning, i PAID $3 for a shower. it was a beautiful thing. it was the shortest shower of my life. and wade thought i was crazy. (and I thought the lady in the stall next to me was crazy...she was singing, LOUDLY. also, I sneezed and she said, "bless you." and I just feel that showers should not be a public thing and I found it odd. but i guess thats what i get for showering while camping.)

lubec, maine

our first night in maine was spent at a cute little bed and breakfast in Lubec, Maine called The Peacock House. It was so quaint and cozy and everything I ever hoped a b&b to be. We stayed in the room called the Captain's Cabin. The next morning, we ate a lovely breakfast with 3 other couples at the same table. They were all old and retired and traveling the world and so stinkin' cute!

the real reason we drove all the way out to lubec, maine was to see the West Quoddy Head Lighthouse. It is on the Easternmost point of the United States and such a looooooooong drive, but I am a fan of lighthouses (I think I inherited that from my mom) and I just had to see this one because it has stripes! oh my poor husband is so supportive of my crazy whims.

we then took a little trail down to the rocky shoreline and walked around the beach. It was so beautiful! wade skipped rocks and explored the tide pools while i...watched. i'm a little off balance with this large accessory and didn't want to risk climbing around slippery rocks. long drives aren't fun with wet bums.

costa vida

wade and I took a much needed vacation away from the city and into maine a few weeks ago. we did so much in just three days, so I'll probably just post them all separately. On our way, we stopped in south portland, maine...and look where we ate!

no, your eyes do not deceive you. that is a true costa vida on the east coast. the one and only, i might add. I believe that one day, i may find myself driving there just for a pork salad. yes, it may be 2 hours away...but desperate times call for desperate measures.

baby shower

my cute ward gave me a baby shower. i love them a lot.

these are the cute presents, party favors and my diaper cake:

they sewed cute little shapes onto onesies:

we ate really yummy fall food...like cider and caramel apples. and I was taught many things by the experienced mothers in my ward, some of them quite graphic and disgusting. :) My favorite part of the night was when I opened a box of nursing pads and a girl yelled out, "WHAT are those??" I think she got even more of an education than I did that night. Mothers put their bodies through a lot... (I'm saying this and I haven't even delivered yet?)
thanks to ashley and adrienne for putting on such a fun party!
i also must add that my cute mother-in-law, kristy and my 2nd cousin, cherri gave me showers in utah which were also so great! i just forgot to take pictures... :( thanks guys!

we feel so blessed and loved! Our little boy is all stocked up on anything he might need. We've been given so many great things and I just can't even wait to use them!

coincidence?

this man's name is gary hennessey. he works for the malden police department. and he is currently my favorite person in the entire world. the story you are about to read is unbelievable.

On Saturday, I was taking this lovely couple - Miriam and Bryant's, pictures in the fall leaves.

We went to a pretty cemetery that was basically desolate. We were the only people there. I find that lugging around my equipment while taking pictures is getting more difficult these days, considering the extra baggage i'm carrying around my mid-section. So I set my camera bag down, by a tree, about ten feet behind me. As we were taking pictures, a man in a silver truck drove by. We thought nothing of it. He drove by again, only this time he stopped for a minute, and slid to the other side of his car and opened the door, then drove away. And we still thought nothing of it. Until five minutes later when I realized that my camera bag that had been so lovingly left by the tree behind me was no longer there. He took my bag!! Snatched it right from underneath my nose and I just let him!

I started to get very nauseous and shaky and sad feeling all over. Because inside that camera bag was my $500 lens. And all my other camera equipment/knick knacks that I have gathered over the years. So we hoped that maybe that man worked for the cemetery. And maybe he was just tidying up...
only why the heck would he take my CAMERA bag if I was standing right there with my CAMERA in my hand? It was very obvious it belonged to me.

So we started to search the cemetery for this silver truck. It was no where to be found. We went to the cemetery office to find out if he worked there. They were closed. So we went back to Miriam and Bryant's apartment and made some phone calls to the city cemetery management, but couldn't get a hold of anyone. At this point, I've pretty much realized that I would never see that precious bag again. And as Miriam so happily put it, "Your chances of getting it back are pretty much zero."

Luckily, my current payment plan for my camera equipment is set up so that I don't have to pay for something that gets lost or stolen. So I called the credit company and they said I needed a police report to prove that it had been stolen. So about 45 minutes after the robbery, we made a call to the police department. I then called Wade to tell him what was going on. He just so happened to be listening to this talk from conference when I called (read it. it's a good one). He didn't mention this to me, but he told me not to worry and that everything would work out. I'm not going to lie, I thought he was full of crap. It would not work out. Things like this don't work out.

The above mentioned man showed up in a very jolly mood. He made me laugh even though I was so upset. And he seemed genuinely interested in helping me get my bag back. He took all my information and the description of my bag down and then suddenly an idea popped into his head. He said, "hey, there's a camera store just a couple blocks away from here. let's go talk to them and tell them to be on the lookout for anyone who might come in trying to sell your lens." I'm so skeptical! I thought it was a ridiculous idea. But I went down there with him anyway.

The manager at the store said he would keep his eye open for someone in a silver truck, but really, thats all the information we could give him. He said he wouldn't just accuse anyone coming in selling a lens of stealing it. And then we left, and I felt like it was pointless going in there.

Miriam and Bryant stayed with me this entire time and were so helpful and supportive. We got back in the car and debated whether or not we should go finish taking pictures. I was pretty grumpy, but figured there was nothing I could do about the situation, so we might as well go finish. We went back to the cemetery and took pictures for about a half hour, when the same police man showed up. He yelled out his window, "Hey! I got your bag back!" And I thought it was a joke. I really did not believe him. He then told me that someone had come to the camera store we went to and tried to sell my lens. He just needed me to come down to the store and identify my equipment and the truck parked outside. Even as we were driving back to the store, I refused to believe that it really was my lens. I didn't want to get my hopes up. Like I said before, things like this just don't work out.

We got to the store and immediately recognized the truck sitting outside. There was the culprit, talking to some policemen and sure enough, it was him. He had told the trade-in manager at the store that his son had dropped his camera in a lake while they were fishing, so he didn't need the lens anymore. Yeah...he left out the part where the fishing was actually stealing, and the lake was actually a cemetery. Anyway, the police showed me the lens and bag and I told them it was mine. So they arrested the poor man and put him in the car right in front of us! And then I felt such sadness for him... such a dumb thing for him to go to jail for.

As we got back in the car, another police man pulled up to the window and told me how lucky I was. He said, "um...that NEVER happens." seriously...how often does stolen merchandise get returned to its owner? So I kept thinking about how "lucky" I was. But once I really started to think about it...I realized it wasn't luck at all. Too many things went right. Too many things could have gone wrong. It just so happened that Gary Hennessey was the police who came to file my report? It just so happened that he thought Hunt's camera store a few blocks away would be a good place to go? It just so happened that the robber chose that store to sell the lens? and it just so happened that we beat the robber to the store before he tried to sell it?

Wade texted me as the police showed up and said, "I'm praying that the cops will know where to find your bag." My cute Wade always has so much faith. Much more than I have. I'm what you would call a realist...which doesn't mean I don't have faith. It just means that certain things in life happen, and I feel that there are natural consequences to those things. And that God doesn't intervene in petty things like camera lenses. But now I'm learning that He does intervene for silly camera lenses. And He knows what's important to me, which means it's important to Him too. And I think He knew that I couldn't possibly handle one more rotten thing to happen to us at this time in our lives (especially financially related...), because I would just be crushed.

and all i can really say about the whole thing is i'm so grateful.

also...i am thinking about naming my first born after him.

wear sunscreen

do you remember this song? I think it came out when I was in Junior High, and still too silly and naive to really believe any of it. But I stumbled upon it again recently...and it's amazing how much I've learned in my wise old age of 23 (ha), because I actually agree with so much of it.

ladies and gentlemen,
wear sunscreen.
if i could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.

the long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own
meandering experience.
i will dispense this advice now.

enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.
oh, never mind.
you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded.
but trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself
and recall in a way you can't grasp now
how much possibility lay before you and
how fabulous you really looked.
you are not as fat as you imagine.

don't worry about the future.
or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as
trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.

the real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind,
the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle tuesday.

do one thing every day that scares you.

sing.

don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

floss.

don't waste your time in jealousy.
sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
the race is long and, in the end,
it's only with yourself.

remember compliments you receive.
forget the insults.
if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
keep your old love letters.
throw away your old bank statements.

stretch.

don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.
the most interesting people i know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives.
some of the most interesting 40-year-olds i know
still don't.

get plenty of calcium.
be kind to your knees.
you'll miss them when they're gone.

maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't.
maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't.
maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.
whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much
or berate yourself either.
your choices are half chance.
so are everybody else's.

enjoy your body.
use it every way you can.
don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it.
it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

dance, even if you have nowhere to do it
but your living room.

read the directions,
even if you don't follow them.

do not read beauty magazines.
they will only make you feel ugly.

get to know your parents.
you'll never know when they'll be gone for good.
be nice to your siblings.
they're your best link to your past
and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

understand that friends come and go,
but with a precious few you should hold on.
work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle,
because the older you get,
the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

live in new york city once,
but leave before it makes you hard.
live in northern california once,
but leave before it makes you soft.
travel.

accept certain inalienable truths.
prices will rise.
politicians will philander.
you, too, will get old.
and when you do,
you'll fantasize that when you were young,
prices were reasonable,
politicians were noble,
and children respected their elders.

respect your elders.

don't expect anyone else to support you.
maybe you have a trust fund.
maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse.
but you never know when either one might run out.

don't mess too much with your hair
or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

be careful whose advice you buy,
but be patient with those who supply it.
advice is a form of nostalgia.
dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal,
wiping it off,
painting over the ugly parts
and recycling it for more than it's worth.

but trust me on the sunscreen.

salem

Did I mention that we love having Jared and Susan here? And our cute little nephew Jackson? We went up to Salem to see the "sights"...although the sights mostly consisted of a harbor and a cemetery. We went to a cute little candy store where we bought yummy clove and root beer flavored candy and also saw a re-enactment of the Salem witch trials.

"The Salem witch trials occurred in colonial Massachusetts between 1692 and 1693. More than 200 people were accused of practicing witchcraft—the Devil's magic—and 20 were executed. Eventually, the colony admitted the trials were a mistake and compensated the families of those convicted. Since then, the story of the trials has become synonymous with paranoia and injustice, and it continues to beguile the popular imagination more than 300 years later." Read more here.

and I have no idea what this pirate has to do with anything.
but secretly, wade wishes he was one.

remember?

remember that time I had a centipede crawl across my stomach?

well I'm sure you didn't think much of it.
I'm sure you thought I was being ridiculous.
I'm sure you thought it was not a big deal.
but I am here to tell you that it was very much a big deal.
also, I would like to show you exactly what it was that so lovingly graced my presence that unforgettable night:

have you ever seen such a thing?
I don't even know if you can even call it a centipede.
call it what you will...
I am being haunted by them daily.
yes. this is a picture of OUR COUCH.
but that is not the only place they exist.
they have also been known to show up in the kitchen sink (which gives me great pleasure because I can then drown them.)
and the bathtub (where they can also be drowned)
and the walls
and the doors
and the carpet
but the good news is they don't make me cry anymore. obviously....
because instead of crying about this one, i took a picture.
it was all for the sake of the blog.
nevertheless, it is proof that I am making progress in my bug freak out episodes.
but this does not mean "centipedes" is not at the top of my list titled: "what i will not miss about massachusetts"

whales

last month, we went whale watching. we hopped on a gigantic boat from a wharf in downtown boston and drove (boated?) far, far, far away from the city and into the middle of the scary, gigantic ocean. and suddenly, there were gigantic animals, known as humpback whales, diving in and out of the water. and i was amazed by the following things:

1. their gigantic-ness



2. the water shooting out of their blow holes

3. and just mostly their gigantic-ness.


(i feel that i must take credit for this picture. i'm that proud of it.)

oh, and our hair...after a very speedy and windy ride...

i know. it's awesome.

p.s. i promise not to use gigantic as a descriptive word anymore.
i think i've out used it for the next year.

it's coming...

here's my belly at 36 weeks...
could it be any bigger?!
also, here's wade's belly...
he wanted in on the fun too.

side note:
i just love you guys!
all of you who read my blog and write such nice things and make me feel so much better about my life.
and i know i'm the worst at commenting,
but i still read your blogs all the time and i think you're all amazing, talented, beautiful people.
is that cheesy? it's true.

side note #2:
dear mom and dad,
i miss you. a lot. and i can't wait until you come visit.

do you like pina coladas?

and getting caught in the rain?
well, i don't like either.
but we went on a walk to the grocery store in some very lovely weather.
warm night. light breeze.
then we walked home. and got drenched.
seriously folks, flash flood drenched.
soaked all the way through and dripping from our noses and hair.
but we laughed the whole way home.
i love my husby...who makes torrential downpours a little more fun.

just because

i love my lamp.

also, i'm feeling down today. which happens once in a while. and I think it's ok to talk about. (sometimes i find myself thinking that so many other people have better lives than i do, because their blogs make their lives look amaaaaazing. and that's not real life.)
we've had a string of bad luck lately. and it's just that. bad luck. I think I try to find blame for everything that ever happens. It's because in my mind, their has to be a reason. It's just how I make sense of things. It's logical to me. Actions have consequences. One thing causes another. BUT, when I can't find a logical reason for the bad things that happen to us, I tend to wonder what it is that we did to deserve this. For example, remember when I was having a bad day? You should know it was because of the following reasons:
*we got towed, yet again, in the same week. TWO TIMES in one week, people. When we were trying so hard...it couldn't be avoided. What more can you do when you read the street signs seventeen times and debate for a half an hour whether it is ok to park there?
*along with the towing, we got THREE tickets that same week...for parking. (is there a criminal record for street parking? because we probably have one by now.)
*miscommunications between wade's school and wells fargo caused our loan money to get rejected. then we fought them and got it back. then the money still never came. more miscommunications and wells fargo took the money back as a payment. so we fought again. and now we're still waiting...and it's very unsettling.
*and the one that is bothering me the most happened today and I just can't get over it. I'm the ward chorister. I lead the music in sacrament meeting. It might not seem like a big deal, but I cried for a week when I got this calling. I'm deathly afraid of standing in front of people! It took me 3 months to get to the point where I could lead the music without my hand shaking and feeling like I was going to pass out. (those who know me well, know this is a VERY big deal to me.) It was just something I finally had to overcome. And I'm not going to say that there aren't times when this still happens to me. Well, someone at church today felt it necessary to come up to me and tell me that I was "making the whole congregation uncomfortable" by where I was standing and by my "lack of communication" with the pianist. He continued on for a long time, telling me everything that I should do differently, and I just stared at him in awe. SERIOUSLY? and then I walked away from him without saying a word, and burst into tears. Never mind that I have never met this man in my life and never spoken a word to him. But apparently this has been going on for weeks now, and he just couldn't keep quiet any longer. There are so many things I could say to defend myself right now. But it's pointless. I don't need to defend myself or justify my actions or the way I do things. It's what works best for me and the pianist and he doesn't know me or my situation or how hard it is for me to do. So I'm choosing to ignore it. But that doesn't mean that I'm not deeply offended and embarrassed.

and so, I'm feeling down. but I'm also learning that there doesn't have to be a reason for everything. I'm not being punished. There are trials we must go through to learn lessons and become better people. But I also think that it's not always like that. I think there are people who offend us, parking tickets that make us mad, and miscommunications that mess everything up. and it's not anyone's fault. Life just...happens.

"...our Heavenly Father and the Savior live and that They love all humanity. The very opportunity for us to face adversity and affliction is part of the evidence of Their infinite love. God gave us the gift of living in mortality so that we could be prepared to receive the greatest of all the gifts of God, which is eternal life. Then our spirits will be changed. We will become able to want what God wants, to think as He thinks, and thus be prepared for the trust of an endless posterity to teach and to lead through tests to be raised up to qualify to live forever in eternal life." -Henry B. Eyring

hope

red sox

is it bad if i only like red sox games because of the kettle corn and singing "Sweet Caroline" during the seventh inning stretch? if it is...then pretend I went to this game because I LOVE BASEBALL! Wade is a bigger fan than I am...he already bought the baby a Wally the Green Monster stuffed animal. really though, I find these games to be quite entertaining. The fans here are ridiculously obsessed and its fun to be part of the madness (sometimes). We decked out in our red sox gear and had a great date night at Fenway Park.

oh the joys

today I walked out to the curb where we parked our car last night.

only...our car wasn't there.
I thought to myself, "Am I losing my mind? I swear we parked here."
and then I saw what we apparently missed last night:

$202 dollars later...
and some investigation as to where exactly they take your car

we had our car back.
remember yesterday when i said, "we looooooove it!"? i lied.
we do love having a car. but on days like this, we basically hate it.
oh the joys of city living and street (parallel) parking.

crane beach

once upon a time, before we had a car (we looooooooove it! more to come...), we took the commuter rail to Ipswich. This involved running to catch a train (i feel like you should know that I am smacking a mosquito that keeps landing on the computer screen and i am very distracted) and much people watching. Wade has long been obsessed with Ipswich. Why? I have no clue. I think he just likes to say, "Ipswich." So it was a dream come true to finally travel here. Until he got there and his poor world was shattered. Ipswich was not everything he dreamed it would be. And now I don't have to listen to him beg to move there anymore. ANYWAY the real reason we went was not for the town, but for the beach. Crane Beach. We layed in the sun all day. and even got in the water like twice. for 3 second intervals. It's cold, people. Try as we might, we cannot find a beach to meet our california beach expectations. But this one got close, in that it had sand. We're finding that these beaches have their own beauty though and we were quite fond of this one.

(this is wade's beard that he grew for a loooong time. to make his "man trip" across the country with his friend official. i will never understand boys. never. more about that to come as well. I'll let him tell it though.)

bad day

and this song keeps running through my head:

"You said, 'I know that this will hurt.'
But if I don't break your heart, things will just get worse.
If the burden seems too much to bear,
remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there."
-relient k

ice cream gone wrong

once upon a time, we went to a place called Smolak Farms. Wade wanted ice cream. It was a sweltering hot day. It was fitting that we should get ice cream. They piled it high. 3 scoops high. Too bad the cone was very small. Too small for 3 scoops of ice cream. Too bad it was very hot. Too hot for ice cream to stay solid. It melted quickly, and so did Wade's temper. He was very unhappy about his messy predicament. And I just laughed at him, the whole time he ate it. Because I got my ice cream in a cup.

washington dc

The White House
(there were snipers on the roof! yikes!)

remember that time jetblue messed up my flight? Well we got a good deal on some flights and decided to go to dc. lucky for us, we have some great friends who were living there for the summer and who were kind enough to let us stay with them and be our personal tour guides around the city. (love you, brooke and heather!) I've never quite been a history person... I must confess that it bores me just a little. I'm sure many of you could say the same about english literature, so we're even. Anyway, it was so awesome to see all the sites and museums and Wade quite enjoyed himself. He could spend DAYS in one museum. Me? I'm done in 10 minutes. My highlight of the trip was meeting up with my long lost friends.

(fyi...I have a horrible memory. please do not mock me if I don't know the
proper names of these buildings ok?)

The Capitol


Heather and Wade...doing what they do best. Being smart.
and talking about smart things. such as presidents engraved in stone.


Library of Congress


The lovely Heather and I, sitting on the steps of the Jefferson Memorial


Does this man look familiar? (not the one in green) Well, he should. and he's famous.
because he's in the museum of portraiture.


The Jefferson Memorial (my favorite, I might add, even if I did have to trek
across the entire city to see it)


World War II Memorial. Proud to be a Utahn, in case you can't tell.

Wade at the World War II Memorial. He is also proud to be a Utahn. He just
doesn't show it as well.


We took a long walk. And saw the Potomac river...

and somehow ended up in Virginia.

California Tortilla

We failed miserably at documenting that Brooke was with us (that...and every picture
I have with her is hideous). So here is proof.
It seems that she likes riding escalators.