diary of a mad waitress

before i even start, i would just like to say:
i am not a bad waitress.
i don't mean to be arrogant.
i've just been doing this for almost 7 years.
and i would like to think that i sort of know what i'm doing by now.
i would also like to think that most people are generally good people inside.
but for some reason,
that completely changes when they dealing with us waitresses,
who are so lowly and scummy that they don't deserve to be treated with respect.
and it has made me lose my "general good people" feeling and start to have a
"general hate all people" feeling.
i more often than not, leave work thinking, "really?? did that REALLY just happen??"
(not all days... there are definitely good people out there, like the ones that leave $20 because they are just that nice.)
onward.
tonight, i had the pleasure of serving 2 young couples.
they ordered all you can eat wings.
the policy is no sharing, no take out boxes.
its all you can eat.
you don't go to chuck-a-rama and take everything home in box.
well, they asked for a box anyway, and i told them no.
its the rules.
its my job.
and apparently it makes me mean.
well they were mad.
they argued.
and 3 minutes later i saw them rolling up their extra wings in a napkin.
A NAPKIN.
and putting them in their pocket. seriously?
never mind that its a little gross....
but seriously?
i don't have to even tell you that they didn't tip me.
oh and then on the way out, one declared that he was calling the "capital of winger's"
as if winger's was a country.
yes, you do that.

AND THEN,
a table of 8 girls,
before i can even say hi,
one starts yelling at me about how she asked 4 times for a highchair and didn't get it.
well i'm not the host, i know nothing about this, but sure i'll get one.
and then another one because you don't like that one.
and then a kids menu and crayons for your child thats too small to even know how to color.
or eat regular food for that matter.
and then when i asked them what they wanted to drink, i was ignored.
and then when i asked them what they wanted to order,
i was ignored.
one girl looked up and rolled her eyes,
and then went back to her conversation.
i was ignored 3 times.
it took them 30 minutes to order.
and then they complain about how long it took to get their food?
well, lets see, i think thats because you sat there forever,
caught up in your ridiculous gossip that you forgot to even notice i was standing there.
and then you have to nerve to write on the tip line of your credit card:
" $0.00 be a better and nicer waitress!!"
ok.
but you be a better and nicer person first.

my job is the best.